MELINDA K. BOWENS

#BreakingTheCycle: Those Sneaky Emotions! After finishing graduate school, I had the most amazing opportunity to be a children’s therapist for a school system nearby. Even though I serviced kindergarten through 12th grade, there was always something about by elementary kids that I loved so much. It was probably because no matter how much of a fake adult I thought I was being that day, to a six-year-old I was as real of an adult as it could get. I also loved how creative (or

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of the Past The past is the past…right?! Well, kinda sorta. Whether it be in real life or a movie, we’ve heard someone utter the words “the past is the past.” And whether it be in real life or a movie, we’ve probably given that statement some serious side eye (with a sprinkle of deep sigh). Because even though the event itself may be over, those remnants still linger rather vividly at times. So what are those remnants? I mean those flashbacks th

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of Anger "Anger is a secondary emotion." I still remember one of my professors from grad school saying that statement in class one day. I also remember rolling my eyes just slightly, while contorting my face greatly to silently express my disagreement. There was nothing subtle about my facial expressions in that moment (or a lot of moments, if I'm honest). Because you mean to tell me, I had lived my entire life to this point believing there were

The Defense of Busyness We’re busy people these days and that statement really came as a shock to no one; but I thought I would start there. Before we keep going, I just want to stop and say this post does not end with a magic formula on how to get it all done. Because if it did, I would be selling that secret to fund my dream of retiring early (and be a full-time writer, of course). And by “get it all done” I mean getting everything on that never-ending to-do list of life th

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of “The Mask” We wear the mask that grins and lies, It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,— This debt we pay to human guile; With torn and bleeding hearts we smile, And mouth with myriad subtleties. Why should the world be over-wise, In counting all our tears and sighs? Nay, let them only see us, while We wear the mask. We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries To thee from tortured souls arise. We sing, but oh the clay is vile Beneath our feet

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of Procrastination Hello. My name is Melinda and I’m a procrastinator. *the rest of the group greets me back* I tell people quite often that I’m a professional procrastinator. I’m not sure why I say that like I’m introducing my profession, but at least it is an honest statement. But as a professional procrastinator, I know there are many of us out there. Just today, several of us spent time doing almost everything imaginable instead of possibly

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of Logic “Makes sense to me.” This simple one liner right here usually comes after we have just explained one of our newest plans to someone (or explained it to ourselves) or after someone else has presented their thoughts to us. No matter who the audience is, typically we’re looking for a plan to make sense. And if it doesn’t, we look for a really polite way to say we want no parts of the foolishness (or not so polite way depending on how craz

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of Pessimism For starters, I don’t think many people claim to be full-time pessimists. Just the thought of that position sounds like a full time job with bad benefits, even worse coworkers and no overtime pay. But even though many of us don’t participate in pessimism on a full-time basis, many of us are guilty of picking up a temp position every now and then; and sometimes more often than we care to admit. But we’re creative people and pessimist

#BreakTheCycle: The Defense of Stubbornness “I’m stubborn, not deaf.” Of all the phrases I say or have said on a regular basis, this had to be in the top 7 (probably more like top 4, but let’s not dwell on that part). I have said this before, but not only did I say it often, I believed it strongly. The idea of someone repeating the same thing to me over and over again didn’t soften my stance, I just dug my heels in deeper. Now, I’m not talking about that bad advice that the

Fear is not a factor…Or maybe it is For much of the early 2000’s I was mildly addicted to this reality show on NBC called Fear Factor. If you don’t remember the show, here’s a brief recap. Each episode, numerous contestants would presumably complete dangerous/frightening stunts and competitions with the hope of winning a large cash prize. I’m not quite sure if it was the competitiveness, the challenges, or my sheer disbelief that someone would participate in those activities

Heart Check Verse of the Day: Proverbs 4:23 “Carefully guard your thoughts because they are the source of true life.” (CEV) “Keep vigilant watch over your heart; that’s where life starts...” (MSG) ”Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” (NLT) “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (NIV) “Keep thy heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life.” (KJV) FORETHOUGHT What does this verse mean

Out of Sight, Out of Mind Verse of the Day: Isaiah 57:11 “Did you forget about me and become unfaithful because you were more afraid of someone else? Have I been silent so long that you no longer fear me.” (CEV) “Who talked you into the pursuit of this nonsense, leaving me high and dry, forgetting you ever knew me? Because I don’t yell and make a scene do you think I don’t exist?...” (MSG) “Are you afraid of these idols? Do they terrify you? Is that why you have lied to me an

Kenya Called. We Answered. Here’s What She Said. Let me be the first to tell you that I didn't understand how people could go visit a foreign country on these things called "mission trips" for a few days, weeks or even months and return home claiming their lives had changed. I didn't comprehend how 10 days of your life in a different place could change 30 years of the life you were already living. Now, I completely understood how a week and half away in a different culture co