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  • Melinda K. Bowens

Own It!

If you’ve ever been around small children (infant aged), then you have probably played the face hide-and-seek game with them. You know, where you cover their little faces with your hand and wait for them to be surprised and happy that you’re still there when you move your hand. Or if baby isn’t having any of that disappearing stuff that day, he/she may get slightly fussy when you come with the games. But whether joyful or upset, babies that young continuously remain surprised that we show back up each time!

If you’ve played this game, you know it can go on and on and on for hours at a time if you leave it up to the kid. And why wouldn’t they want to keep playing? It’s something new and exciting for them every time they own their eyes. Kind of like a present!


But thinking back to this game, I thought about how we play this same game with things in our lives all the time. We tuck people, places, incidents, events and even dreams away in the back of our minds, close the door and expect that to be the end of it. And every now and then that door opens up and we catch a glimpse of what we thought was hidden and feel surprised all over again; as if it’s the first time we’re ever seeing those things.

Why do we try and hide things internally from ourselves? Or maybe more importantly, how do we think we’re going to hide things internally from ourselves? I mean, we were the ones who hid them. Doesn’t that mean we always know where the hiding place is? These were really just a few questions that I had for myself and thought you may connect with them too.

So, at this point some of us are trying to hide past ambitions, dreams, failures, hurts, pains, abuse and heartache in our emotional storage closets; only to be surprised when that doors opens and all those feelings hit us once again. Exactly how did we think this was a good plan again? And how is it working out so far?


For most of us, this plan isn’t working out too well these days. And if we get honest for a minute, it was never working out greatly, it was just more tolerable at other times. But getting more honest is the larger point I’m getting to right here. We need to own what we think and feel. I mean, we are certainly the ones thinking it and feeling it; might as well stop acting like it’s coming from some mystery third party.

So what are we “owning?” Happy you asked! We are owning:

-Our dreams and ambitions that we pushed to the side and never invested in developing

-Our past failures (personally, professionally, etc…) and the pain it caused us and others

-Our hurts from past events, relationships, all of it

-Our times of abuse where we felt helpless and isolated

-Our figurative and literal heartache that we carry each day from trying to hide from ourselves

-Our *insert whatever needs to be added to this list for you to get healing*

And why do we need to be honest? Well, because God told us to be honest with others, so I’m pretty convinced that means we need to be honest with ourselves too.

Better to be poor and honest than to be dishonest and a fool.

Proverbs 19:1

Now I won’t take that verse out of context and try to create a new meaning. But I will say what jumped out to me as I read it. If it is better to be poor and honest than dishonest and a fool, then it’s better to be aware of our brokenness and on the right path to healing than hiding our pain and wearing our best painted smile.


Chat with God


In what areas do you struggle most with “owning” your thoughts and feelings?


Why are these areas so difficult to “own?”


What is your once sentence prayer in this situation?


Please invite a friend to this series who you think would like to join this journey! Click here!

Get information about my new book here!

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