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  • Melinda K. Bowens

Don't Let "What If" Ruin Your Day!

Hey y’all!!! How’s it hanging?? Hopefully well! If not, let’s work on that together!

I’ve shared before (in several postings) that I am a thinker and will take about 4-6 business months to make a decision if left to my own reasoning. And just so we know, there is a fine line between me being thorough and me being anxiously overrun by my own thoughts. But a large part of that decision-making time is me pondering dozens of different “what if” situations. However, something I know about myself is that I never imagine the good side of “what if” (and that may be how you work as well). My thoughts are typically more of…

  • What if I take this job and something else better comes along??

  • What if I quit this job and nothing else better comes along??

  • What if no one else comes along after him? (Cause single life is great and trying at the same time, we don’t have to lie here lol)

  • What if I don’t do everything today?! Won’t I be behind forever?!

Now I know that escalated quickly, but that really is how I speak to myself sometimes. And honestly, it’s how a lot of us speak to ourselves quite often. If we had a friend who thought their life was going to cease to exist because of one perceived “missed opportunity,” we would quietly tell them to chill all the way out because that isn’t a rational thought. But somehow, we made ourselves the exception to the rule. Everyone else is allowed to live fulfilled lives, including mistakes and learning experiences, but for some reason we’re not afforded that same chance?! Boooooooooo! I don’t like it! I want a do over!


It's okay to expect good things!

Let me tell you a little secret…It’s okay to expect good things to happen. We don’t gain anything (other than ulcers) by expecting the worst-case scenario. I know it seems comforting to think we’re merely assessing the situation from every angle, but I want to challenge that train of thought with a couple of questions.

  1. Are we comforted because we found solutions?

  2. Or are we comforted because this is what we have always done and familiarity breeds comfort?

I want you to take a real moment here and list all the ways expecting the worst has brought peace and progress to your life. Don’t worry, I’ll wait (Katt Williams’ voice).


If your list is pretty short (or nonexistent like mine), the next three points may be a little more helpful to remember:

1. God is smarter than us.

I hate to break it to you fam, but we are not the smartest beings in this plan. Don’t get me wrong, we’re smart but not “wiser than the ruler of the universe” type of smart!With that thought in mind, all of our overthinking doesn’t begin to add up to the plan God has for us and all of His people.So, we get the chance to hop out of the driver’s seat and enjoy the ride.

Helpful verse:

For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:9 NLT

2. We can’t be behind on a timeline God didn’t design.

God does not do time the way we do time.His concern is that we love Him and love others.Period.We tend to be more focused on things such as “finding purpose,” the next job, or next big move (which happens so easily) because tangible things feel safer. However, God is focused on our character and our heart. And while He will give us the desires of our heart, He wants our heart first.

Helpful verses:

But do not forget one thing, my dear friends! There is no difference in the Lord's sight between one day and a thousand years; to him the two are the same. The Lord is not slow to do what he has promised, as some think. Instead, he is patient with you, because he does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants all to turn away from their sins. 2 Peter 3:8-9 GNT

3. We can only do some of the things, some of the time.

We were never meant to do it all, especially in our own strength. We have our own very unique set of talents and gifts that will be developed and used for the appropriate times.But doing all of the things, all of the time?! Hard pass! That’s a breeding ground for burnout because we become busy, but empty.

Helpful verse:

God has also given each of us different gifts to use. Romans 12:6a CEV


So, I have a new question I want us to ask ourselves each time we feel tempted to “what if” ourselves into a tizzy. Ask…

What if I believed I had everything I need for today?

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