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  • Melinda K. Bowens

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of Titles

#BreakingTheCycle: The Defense of Titles

Titles sound so prestigious. The introduction of Dr. Grey or the mention of Maxine Shaw, Attorney at Law just seem to carry so much more weight than merely saying hello to Meredith and Max. Why is that???

More than those titles we get after spending years and years in school, the titles we acquire in life also add something to us. The areas such as husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, fiancé, mother, father, etc…Whatever the moniker, we tend to have some attachment to the meaning.

There is something about a title that does more than add information; it adds a little level of familiarity. When we hear these different labels, we begin to define what that label means. We think about our own experiences with each one of those groups. Whether it be good experiences or times we would rather forget, meaning follows that title.


Much how we apply meaning to titles for other people, we apply those same titles and meanings to ourselves. And the once we’ve decided what something means, we tend to stick to that definition. Even if we’re wrong at times, we’re still committed (and there is something to be said about commitment). Now, being familiar with clear definitions isn’t really a bad thing. But what happens when our categories and descriptions are so concrete, but yet don’t fit with our lives anymore.

Here’s what I mean by that.

I have been (and known as) a rather talkative, personable, sometimes (actually often) loud person for most of my life. Now, if you already know me, then you’re somewhere in the internet world nodding your head in vigorous agreement. If you’re my mother, you’re somewhere having flashbacks to me signing in the house at the top of my lungs like three other people didn’t live there (that is actually a quote from my actual mother).

Now these are relatively good things. But I’m also known to be bossy (not surprising) and quite unyielding (even less surprising) once my mind is made up about something. I just said a couple of days ago that I’m stubborn, not deaf.


All these different titles make up who I am. All your different titles make up who you are as well. But what happens when we want to be something or someone else besides the titles we’ve always been known by? Or better yet, what happens when God is calling us to be different that our familiar titles and we don’t want to give them up?

Let’s not get shocked here. Because there are some titles in our lives that we just absolutely love and we hope there’s never a time where we won’t have it. I’m super guilty of this. I get a special ticker in my heart when my students call me Professor Bowens (even though I’m an instructor, but I think this is a mistake we can look over). There is something about the idea that I attach to the word “professor” that makes it special to me. And there’s something about a title in your life as well that you hold on to more than others.

We spend quite a bit of time living the labels we’ve created or that others have created for us. But then we sometimes spend less time living the identity labels that Christ has given us (2 Corinthians 5:17; 1 Peter 2:9; John 15:15, and so many more). How Christ describes us may be pretty new and a little foreign to us, but are we truly willing to let the familiar titles in our lives keep us from a forever relationship with God?


Chat with God (Be honest. It’s just you and Him)


Which three titles are most important to you in life?


Why are these titles closest to you? Would you struggle to give them to God?


What is your one sentence prayer to God in this situation?


Please invite a friend to this series who you think would like to join this journey!

Get information about my new book here!

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